In the water

It honestly feels sometimes like every single woman on the face of this earth is pregnant, but me.

I was wandering around Facebook and was looking at some new pictures that the little sister of an old friend of mine had added, and lo and behold, saw my old friend Michelle posing, pregnant, with her husband.

It just seems like everyone is getting their babies but me. Why did I have to lose mine? I should be having my baby shower, I should be getting huge and fat, feeling baby kick.. I should be due in about 6 weeks. But I’m not. I’m not, I’m not, I’m not.

And I frigging hate it. Why did this have to happen to me? I am not one for self pity, but this is just one thing I can’t shake. It’s been 6 months since I lost the baby, and I’m still sad about it. I still think, “Why?” I still get sad when I see pregnant women. When someone I know gets pregnant, it still hurts.

When is it going to be my turn? For REAL this time? Not, “Oh! You’re pregnant. Wait, nevermind, no you’re not. BACK TO SQUARE ONE.”


  1. Im so sorry, Natalie.It's been six months since my last miscarriage too. I know we are not exactly in the same situation right now, but I feel for you, I really do. I know what it's like to be insanely jealous of every pregnant women you see walking down the street, to be angry and sad so often that you don't know what to do with yourself.I hope that a little more time can help heal your heart, and that you can get another BFP very soon!!!Waiting just sucks.Hang in there.Nicole from TTCAM

  2. Worrybook says:

    It's been 1 and a half years since my miscarriage and still no baby to hold in my arms. Some days I feel "over it" and other days it hits me like a ton of bricks. I think the best way to deal with it is to write it out. Don't worry about sounding ungrateful or whiny or whatever.Just get your feelings on paper.Good luck in getting PG this time around. I am on to month 5 of TTC again. It's a hard, hard struggle but I am ready to worry about another m/c instead of worrying about whether or not I will ever actually GET pregnant again.The odds are your second pregnancy will be a sticky one.

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