Lessons from New Mommyhood

Things I’ve Learned in 5 Days of Motherhood

  1. Breastfeeding is really difficult, but when your baby latches and your milk starts coming in, you feel like a superhero. Also, it’s really weird when your breasts leak.
  2. Sitting comfortably with stitches from a perineal tear is impossible.
  3. Eating is a luxury unless you have guests over to hold the baby. You will find yourself hunkered over a plate, shoveling leftover lasagna in your mouth at 4:00 in the morning in a hurry before the baby needs to eat again.
  4. Engorged breasts hurt like a MOTHER.
  5. When your child pees or poops in their diaper, you feel like throwing a parade.
  6. Speaking of poop, the term “holy crap” takes on a whole new meaning.
  7. Baby monitors are simultaneously the most wonderful, and nerve-wracking inventions ever made.
  8. Kidoppotamous Swaddlers, and the Halo Sleep Sack deserve the Nobel Prize for peace.. And I need about 5 more of each.
  9. I am fairly certain that I will never catch up on all the blog posts I’ve missed, and I apologize.
  10. This is the most amazing this that’s ever happened to me.