Better Homes & Garden FAIL: The Anti-Public Breastfeeding Comment

I’m not sure if you’ve heard, but this woman named Heather at Better Homes and Gardens recently published a blog entitled “The 10 Commandments of Dining with Little Kids”.

From her opening lines, this article screams, “I HAVE NO CHILDREN!“:

“Let me be clear: I am not anti-kid. I adore children in all their lovable, spontaneous, energetic glory. However, in recent years, I’ve noticed a pronounced blurring of the boundaries between “adult world” and “kid world”, especially when it comes to dining out. Those seeking romantic, contemplative dining may find themselves irked by erstwhile tots in a refined restaurant — but I don’t think anyone is ready to institute a kid ban. Really, we can all get along…”

Okay, first of all, what a way to start your article by putting any reader who may have children on the defensive. “Adult world” and “kid world?” Really? Last time I checked, WE ALL SHARE THE SAME SPACE, YOU IDIOT.

Some of the things she says are big, fat, no-brainers for parents. A lot of them are good points. What I have a problem with (besides the breastfeeding comment) is the overall tone of the article.

Here is her gem of an article:

With this in mind, BHG.com offers our ten commandments for kids in upscale restaurants — gentle reminders for parents and non-parents alike — as well as kid-friendly recipes for creating your own restaurant experience at home.

THOU SHALT NOT BLOCK TRAFFIC WITH BULKY STROLLERS
Strollers have begun to overtake cars and wristwatches as conspicuous status symbols. You may be proud of your double-wide Maclaren, but be sure not to leave it jutting out in a place where waiters and other patrons might trip over in transit.

Leave the stroller at home and indulge your family with this melty, tasty Chicken and Cheese Panini.

THOU SHALT NOT ORDER A 10-COURSE TASTING MENU WITH KIDS UNDER 10
Kids, as we all know, have kid-sized attention spans. Attempting to make them sit still while you enjoy a world-renowned chef’s esoteric, glacially-paced tasting menu isn’t going to be a pleasant experience for anyone.

For a fast meal your kids will still savor, whip up this Quick Crunchy Chicken Dinner.


THOU SHALT NOT TREAT YOUR SERVER LIKE A SITTER

Your server is there to accommodate you, but customer service has its limits. While most waiters are happy to engage and amuse your little one, it’s bad form to delegate your child-minding duties to the person taking your sea bass order.

Let your kids serve themselves with our Best Yummy Mexican Meals.

THOU SHALT NOT BREAST FEED AT THE TABLE
Yes, I have seen table-side breast feeding at a four-star restaurant. If at all possible, take it to the ladies room. (Note: most upscale restaurants have really nice restrooms!)

If you’re breastfeeding, you likely want to cook something quick, easy, and protein-rich; we love this Speedy Bow Tie Pasta Dinner.

THOU SHALL FEEL FREE TO ORDER “KID FOOD” OFF THE MENU
Most restaurants are happy to provide kid-friendly cuisine, so don’t hesitate to ask, just keep in mind you may experience sticker shock (e.g., $23 for pasta with butter)

For a filling and savory twist on basic spaghetti, try these hearty Filled Pasta Entrees.

THOU SHALL NOT TURN DINNER INTO A PHOTOSHOOT
It’s exciting to see your little one all dressed up at the table, and special occasions and birthdays are naturally conducive to photos, but overzealous documentation with flash photography, flip-cams, and camcorders can be distracting to fellow diners.

Say “cheese” with these ten tasty Macaroni and Cheese recipes.

THOU SHALT NOT BRING NOISY TOYS
It’s wise to bring a few of your kid’s favorite toys for their amusement but try not to bring excessively loud games and bleep-blooping electronic toys — or at least be sure there’s a volume-off button.

Keep their hands busy with a finger-food meal, such as this tasty Buffalo Wing Dinner.

THOU SHALL TRY TO QUELL HIGH-PITCHED SCREAMING
Unexpected tantrums and outbursts are a fact of life, but when a parent sits stoically as their child screams without any intervention, the mood of the room can quickly turn from convivial to incredulous to profoundly irritated.

They’ll be screaming with joy for these homemade Mini Pizzas With Pizazz.

THOU SHALT NOT ALLOW FREE-RANGE KIDS
When you let your child run free in the restaurant, it’s not only disruptive to other diners, but it could be a safety hazard: Restaurants are full of hot plates and sharp cutlery, and kids underfoot could cause a major disaster.

Keep them planted happily in their seats with this zesty, crunchy Skillet Tostada Dinner.

THOU SHALL CALMLY DISCOURAGE FOOD FIGHTS
Ah, the food fight. The epitome of fun at summer camp and grade school cafeterias — less so at Michelin-starred eateries. If the food starts flying, quietly and firmly put an end to it.

And if your kids politely make their way through the meal without incident, treat them to a well-deserved Dessert treat.

******************

So, clearly, everyone is screaming for this author’s head over the “take it to the bathroom” comment. Yes, it’s completely and utterly inappropriate and insensitive. How would YOU like to eat your dinner in the bathroom, you pompous wench? Go ahead, take your chicken finger basket, sit on the toilet and see how appetizing that is.

That “commandment” is bad enough. The entire article reeks of “holier than thou because I don’t have kids” attitude. I was seriously offended by this shit, and surprised that BH&G approved it for publishing. Let me make myself perfectly clear:

We take our child out in public to eat. Why? Because being a parent is fucking stressful, and we deserve a damn night out. Even if it means hauling the baby with us, which we are more than happy to do. You know why? Because she has just as much of a right to be in public at a restaurant as you, Ms. High and Mighty. Of course children need to obey certain rules and act a certain way in public; that goes without saying. But as for “not turning dinner into a photoshoot” or “not bringing noisy toys?” I’m sorry, but you can kiss my effing ass. I will take as many pictures of my child as I want to. And I will bring her toys that make her happy if I so choose. Again – YOU DON’T OWN THIS EFFING PLANET, AND SHE HAS A RIGHT TO BE HERE TOO.

This woman is so ridiculously out of line for writing this article, and if you go to the original article here:

The 10 Commandments

I think you’ll see that most everyone agrees with me. Go ahead and visit the link, and speak your mind about what YOU think about this sorry excuse for writing. Obviously some of the things on the list are no brainers: don’t use your waiter as a sitter, try and reign in a tantrum ASAP (even if it means carrying your babe outside until he/she calms down), and one I partially agree with is the “don’t block the way with a stroller” comment. Yes, it’s rude to put your stroller in the way but you know what? I’m not going to NOT bring my stroller into a restaurant. I’ll fold it up and do my best to keep it out of the way, but I’m not going to NOT bring it and just “Leave the stroller at home and indulge your family with this melty, tasty Chicken and Cheese Panini.”

You know what, Heather W. from Better Homes and Gardens? Maybe YOU’RE the one who should just stay home and try the tasty meals that you so “helpfully” suggested and let us annoying parents burden the “adult world” with our little ones. Or maybe you should just remove the GIGANTIC STICK FROM YOUR ASS.

I think that’s a better plan, don’t you?

Comments

  1. Amen! In this day and age, why would she even think it would be appropriate to suggest that breastfeeding mother has to stay home until she weans her baby?
    Janice – The Fitness recently posted..Motivation Monday- November 22- 2010

  2. Have you ever thought about adding a little bit more than just your articles?
    I mean, what you say is important and everything. However
    think about if you added some great photos
    or video clips to give your posts more, “pop”!
    Your content is excellent but with pics and clips, this website could
    definitely be one of the best in its field. Very good blog!
    dunkin doughnuts coffee recently posted..dunkin doughnuts coffee

Trackbacks

  1. […] would be in order. People are writing in to BHG and telling them how upset they are. They are telling her and BHG off in many colorful ways. There’s already a BHG Boycott page up on Facebook and the #boycottBHG […]

Speak Your Mind

*

CommentLuv badge