Momsomnia

So, I have discovered a phenomenon that is wholly new to motherhood – and it is frustrating beyond belief.

I call it “momsomnia”. If you have little ones, I am sure you probably know exactly what I’m talking about.

It’s the end of the day, and you are exhausted. Your mind is tired, your body is tired, and you have finally won the bedtime battle and the baby is asleep. With a sigh, you look around at the chaos that is your house. There is laundry to be done, dishes in the sink and the cats haven’t been fed yet. Do you even have the energy to shower? You decide that the laundry and dishes can wait. You pour food in the cats’ bowl and drag yourself to the bathroom where you halfheartedly wash your face. You slip into your PJs, crawl into bed and with a happy sigh of relief, your head hits the pillow.

And your brain snaps awake.

You lay there for the next ten minutes, willing yourself to go to sleep but to no avail. Your brain is bouncing, your body is tense, and you just can not relax. You try and think sleepy thoughts. You count sheep in your head, and still your mind remains awake and alert as though something is about to happen at any second. You finally give up and get out of bed, doing something to keep yourself occupied until you can manage to fall asleep.

This happens to me constantly. No matter how drained I am, no matter how exhausting a day I had, sometimes when I crawl into bed and try and relax, I just cannot fall asleep. This is something that has never happened to me before, and it came about after I had Nellie. I don’t know if it’s because my brain is aware of the white noise coming from the monitor and is listening for little sleep sighs and noises, or if my body is afraid to relax and succumb to sleep for fear that she could wake at any second. Maybe it’s a touch of post-partum anxiety. I don’t know. But sometimes I lay there and feel physically tense with knots in my stomach. I’m not thinking of anything in particular; it’s just like my body refuses to relax and let sleep take it.
It’s very frustrating, because I am tired but I just can’t rest.

What about you, mamas? Do you suffer from Momsomnia?

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