The Nellie 2010 Human Alarm Clock

Tired of wondering and worrying whether or not you forgot to set your alarm, or if it will go off at all in the morning? Maybe it’s time you stopped relying on a machine to wake you up and started using the Human Alarm Clock system! With the Human Alarm Clock system, you have a reliable and foolproof way of ensuring that you never sleep in again. Ever. For the rest of your life.

Introducing The Nellie 2010! The Nellie 2010 is reliable and trustworthy when it comes to waking you up from even the deepest sleep.  Do you crave variety and get tired of hearing the same old sound each and every morning? Well, the Nellie 2010 has three settings: coo, whine, and scream and you never know which sound you’re gonna get! It’s a fun surprise every single morning of your life, forever and ever!

The Nellie 2010 is guaranteed to make sure you are awake when you need to be. She is so guaranteed to make sure you’re awake on time, that she often goes off 15 to 30 minutes before you planned on being awake! Now that’s an alarm clock that you can rely on to do the job right! Did I mention that you never, ever again have to worry about sleeping in? Ever? I mentioned that, right?

The Nellie 2010 tends to soil herself from time to time but clean-up is easy with a few swipes of a baby wipe. She needs regular feeding and lots of hugs and snuggles. To ensure the Nellie 2010 keeps in proper working order, praise her and love her regularly. The Nellie 2010 also works as:

  • A means of exercise (running after her)
  • A vacuum (eating goldfish crackers off the floor)
  • Cat trainer (her constant shrieking keeps felines in line)
  • Recording system (you say it, she repeats it)
  • Comic relief
  • Heart warmer
  • Expert cuddler

The Nellie 2010 is not available in stores. Please inquire in the comments if interested. The Nellie 2010 is prone to sudden fits of whining, tantrums and screaming. Mommy Boots is not responsible for any havoc and destruction the Nellie 2010 may wreak. By acquiring the Nellie 2010, you acknowledge that you will pretty much never sleep past 6:00 A.M. ever again.

 

 

Comments

  1. Yes we have a similar model, the Logan 2010, which still goes off prematurely a few times at night and then for good at 6:30am. Unfortunately, an automatic coffee dispenser is not included for the price.
    Breann recently posted..Vicious Cycle

  2. I must have a prototype; mine is from 2009. Its warranty hasn’t run out yet though! I used to have to take medication to help me fall asleep at night, which in turn made it hard to get up in the morning. No longer a problem! Since having the Chubbs 2009 in my life, I can sleep anytime, anywhere, and get up at the slightest peep. A solid investment!
    Jessica recently posted..Rock and Roll- Endeavor Thanks for the memories

  3. Oh, we have one of those! Ours is also a 2010 – Sailor model. It’s so great because I’ve always wanted to never sleep past 6:30am! ACTUALLY, we have another model that comes in the form of a small mutt – the Sampson 2003 – and HE goes off every morning around 5:30. It’s divine.
    Liza@Blahggy recently posted..On My Own- Pretending Hes Beside Me

  4. Hmm… mine’s an “ancient” version…. the Maddox 2005. It quit working SEVERAL years ago. Although on the weekends it still fires up with an “I’m hungry,” around 8am or 9am.
    Jackie recently posted..My Growing Boy

  5. Hmmm I have been looking for a new alarm clock. Does she work as an Iphone dock as well?
    Veronica recently posted..The Oversharing Illusion

Trackbacks

  1. […] even been chirping when she’s been waking up. I wrote earlier in the week about my fabulous Human Alarm Clock and at the time, I was still mildly amused at the fact that she’d been waking up earlier and […]

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