Tired of wondering and worrying whether or not you forgot to set your alarm, or if it will go off at all in the morning? Maybe it’s time you stopped relying on a machine to wake you up and started using the Human Alarm Clock system! With the Human Alarm Clock system, you have a reliable and foolproof way of ensuring that you never sleep in again. Ever. For the rest of your life.
Introducing The Nellie 2010! The Nellie 2010 is reliable and trustworthy when it comes to waking you up from even the deepest sleep. Do you crave variety and get tired of hearing the same old sound each and every morning? Well, the Nellie 2010 has three settings: coo, whine, and scream and you never know which sound you’re gonna get! It’s a fun surprise every single morning of your life, forever and ever!
The Nellie 2010 is guaranteed to make sure you are awake when you need to be. She is so guaranteed to make sure you’re awake on time, that she often goes off 15 to 30 minutes before you planned on being awake! Now that’s an alarm clock that you can rely on to do the job right! Did I mention that you never, ever again have to worry about sleeping in? Ever? I mentioned that, right?
The Nellie 2010 tends to soil herself from time to time but clean-up is easy with a few swipes of a baby wipe. She needs regular feeding and lots of hugs and snuggles. To ensure the Nellie 2010 keeps in proper working order, praise her and love her regularly. The Nellie 2010 also works as:
- A means of exercise (running after her)
- A vacuum (eating goldfish crackers off the floor)
- Cat trainer (her constant shrieking keeps felines in line)
- Recording system (you say it, she repeats it)
- Comic relief
- Heart warmer
- Expert cuddler
The Nellie 2010 is not available in stores. Please inquire in the comments if interested. The Nellie 2010 is prone to sudden fits of whining, tantrums and screaming. Mommy Boots is not responsible for any havoc and destruction the Nellie 2010 may wreak. By acquiring the Nellie 2010, you acknowledge that you will pretty much never sleep past 6:00 A.M. ever again.