When Mommy Met Daddy : Part Six

It’s been since November since I wrote a chapter in the story of how my husband Josh and I met in love. For those of you who might need a refresher, you can start from the beginning and work your way through. Here’s a list of previous posts:

Which brings us to When Mommy Met Daddy: Part Six.

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I left with my Ex that night. We drove around for a while, talking. We went to Wal-Mart and walked around, talking. Finally we arrived back at the home that we’d shared and you guessed it.. More talking. We talked in circles; about how it hurt to split but how it felt right at the same time. We talked until the wee hours of the morning. I finally had to stop my ex from talking because it was 2 A.M. and I had to be at work the next morning. We said our good-nights, and I went to sleep in the bed with him on the couch.

The next morning I woke, feeling clear-headed and confident in my decision. We parted with a hug and I drove to work. The sun was shining and I felt lighter than I had in a very long time. I had done something I never thought I’d be able to do and I felt on top of the world.

The next few weeks aren’t very noteworthy. Josh and I hung out a lot. I went to work, I searched for an apartment, I vomited all over Josh at a party, you know. Normal stuff. I stayed with Josh’s brother for about three weeks while I looked for a place to live. One week in November, Josh’s brother went to Orlando and left the both of us to house-sit. Josh didn’t see the use in commuting back and forth from there and his parents’ house so he stayed in Tim’s room and I stayed in the guest room. We hung out a lot. Went out to eat, watched movies, etc. I forced him to watch both Jesus Christ Superstar and Chicago in one evening, which is not unusual for me but for someone who doesn’t love musicals? Zzzzzz.

There was a lot of weird tension between us. The desire to be together was there in both of us, but I was acutely aware of wanting and needing space in order to figure out what I wanted. I desperately did not want to mislead or hurt Josh in any way. I was feeling very confused. Josh was being a wonderful friend, cheering me up when I was feeling sad or lonely and giving me little gifts and flowers. It wasn’t unusual for him to appear at the restaurant holding a single rose he’d picked from somewhere. I felt myself falling for him and it terrified me.

One night, we came back to his brother’s house after watching a movie. We chatted about the film for a few minutes and I went off to brush my teeth and get ready for bed. When I was done, we said our good-nights and I headed into my room. I was changing into my pajamas when I noticed something lying on my pillow. I went over and picked it up. It was a small, square object with a piece of paper wrapped around it. I gently unfolded the paper and read in Josh’s handwriting:

I know I give you flowers, but flowers wilt and die.
You deserve to look at something beautiful anytime you want.

I set the piece of paper aside curiously, and opened the small wooden object in my hand. I was greeted with a startled, scared reflection of myself.

It was a mirror.

My breath caught in my chest and I sat down on the bed. I stared at my reflection and watched as my eyes welled up with tears. I quickly shut the mirror and clutched it to my chest. The tears began to fall and I became overwhelmed with feelings of affection, of happiness, and of fear.

I knew right then and there that we could have something beautiful but I just wasn’t ready. I couldn’t love Josh yet. I knew that we had to have a talk, and soon.

Comments

  1. oh my god that is SO SWEET. I cried when I read “a mirror”. Seriously. How cute. DO NOT WAIT A HUNDRED BILLION MONTHS BEFORE POSTING THE NEXT IN THE SERIES PLEASE!!

    (As a side note, as I am posting this comment your CommentLuv is screaming at me down below that it is about to stop working in a few weeks because it is out of date and PLEASE ASK THE WEBMASTER TO UPDATE THEIR COMMENTLUV IN THE DASHBOARD OF THIS SITE)

    God so many capital letters. I feel like yelling today. I’M GOING TO SEE HARRY POTTER IN AN HOUR!!
    Kristi Dorson recently posted..HEY Y’ALL (dialect vlog)

  2. OMG. Who knew he was so romantic??? That is so cute!
    Beth @ Me as a Mommy recently posted..A Baby Tutu Tutorial

  3. I read this post right after reading your post about finding Carl the soul-sucking demon in your freezer. Such a dichotomy. You never know what to expect. :-)

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