Ten Things that Make Me Angry

The prompt I chose for this week’s Writer’s Workshop is “Ten Things That Make Me Angry”.

Mama’s Losin’ It

Oh, boy. There are so many things I could list here. There are so many really heavy things I could list here. Discrimination. Hate. That asshole that shot up the movie theatre in Colorado. But I try not to get overly heavy and doom and gloom here on my blog, so instead, I chose to try and keep this “angry list” light and funny. Here we go.

1. Orange cars. OH MY GOD. I hate orange cars. HATE. I actually just kind of overall hate the color orange. But every time I see an orange car I am all like RAGE WHY ARE YOU DRIVING A BIG GIGANTIC ORANGE? ORANGE IS FOR FRUIT. IT IS NOT FOR CARS. GET OFF MY ROAD.
2. Judge-y bumper stickers. I’m all for letting the world know who you are and where you stand by plastering sticky phrases all over your car. Sticker it up. Whatever. But when I see ones that are all “Marriage = Stick Figure Man + Stick Figure Woman” or “If you abort babies you’re going to hell” (ok I made that one up, but some stickers aren’t far from that) it makes me kind of stabby.

Maybe I’m just being hypocritical by saying I don’t want to see bumper stickers that contrast with my own personal and political beliefs, but whatever. It still makes me angry.
3. Kevin Costner. WHY DOES HE KEEP GETTING WORK?
4. Bradford pear trees.


Wow, look at nature’s splendor! Harbingers of Spring! They’re so beautiful! You know what they also are? EVIL. They make my eyes water, my throat burn, and my face feel like it’s going to fall off. And the best part? Chattanooga is LOUSY with them. They’re usually the first things to bloom in the Spring. The parking lot outside my office is literally LINED with these things. GTFO TREES OF DEATH. GTFO.
5. People who say “working hard, or hardly working?”.


6. Nickleback. WHY DO THEY KEEP MAKING MUSIC?
7. 100+ degree weather. I know almost everyone in the country feels me on this one. What’s the point of having weather that hot? THERE IS NO POINT. IT’S USELESS. It is conducive to NOTHING. No one enjoys walking outside and instantly being drenched in sweat. NO ONE. It just makes me irrationally angry and want to throw a tantrum.
8. When my iPhone takes too long to do something. I know, I know. It’s going into space. I should be a little patient. BUT FOR CRYING OUT LOUD. It’s an IPHONE. GO. FASTER. I want my Facebook updates NOW. Not in 10 seconds. NOW.
9. People who interrupt. This one. OMFG this one. Nothing makes me angrier than a consistent interrupter. Like, when you’re talking, and they just butt right in and talk over you. I’m sorry. Are you deaf? Did you HEAR me talking? I know you did, because YOU JUMPED INTO MY CONVERSATION. There is no excuse for someone over the age of five to interrupt. It’s just bad manners. It makes me want to throw something at the interrupter. WAIT YOUR TURN.
10. Bad drivers. Because who likes bad drivers? Some idiot tried to zip into my lane the other day without looking and I wanted to chase her down and smack her. Tailgaters, people who drive too fast; if they’re bad, I can’t stand them. HULK SMASH.

Whew! I feel better venting all of those angry things. Thanks, Mama Kat, for giving me a platform and an excuse to be totally ranty on my blog.

What are some things that make you angry?

Comments

  1. I will forgive you for the Bradford Pear comment. I heart them.
    Because interrupters? HATE them too.

  2. I feel ya on this 100+ weather…it’s just no good. It’s got to stop. It’s melting my face. 😛
    Heather@KeepCalmAndLoveOn recently posted..Indecisive is my middle name.

  3. I hate the preachy bumper stickers, too. I’m sure you’ve noticed there’s a local trucking company & the back of all their trucks has a sticker that says “it’s not a choice, it’s a child”. I feel stabby every time I see one of those trucks. And I feel very stabby every time I see some idiot with an anti-Obama sticker. I don’t mind the ones that just say “McCain 2008” or “Romney 2012”; that’s their opinion and they are entitled to it. I hate the ones that are mean-spirited and petty and play into the partisian fear-mongering. They aren’t supporting their guy, they are tearing down ours (who didn’t need a Supreme Court ruling to get into the White House, btw.)

    And I’ll let you in on my and my hubby’s little joke about Bradford Pears. We call them Cum Trees because when they are blooming they smell like used condoms. Think about that next spring. 😉

  4. Love it! Especially the sentiment of the Willy Wonka picture, and the Bradford Pears. My parents recently had 3 come down in their driveway because they split. I’m not sure who convinced everybody 15 years ago that these trees were awesome, because they’re not.
    _emily_rose recently posted..thanks y’all

  5. I hate the preachy bumper stickers too! And 100 degree HUMID days are evil.

  6. Your utter disdain for Kevin Costner makes me laugh (not LOL, though, because really, how many people do you think are actually laughing out loud when they type that?). I’m laughing inwardly. I remember you mentioning Waterworld on Twitter some time ago.

    I totally agree with you about Bradford pear trees, though. When I was in college they planted a ton of them right down the center of campus. They were über-stinky. Then, when we bought our house, there was one right in front of our kitchen. One night a gigantic branch just snapped right off and onto our roof.

    We had that tree permanently removed the next day. A lovely dwarf magnolia has since replaced it….
    Mary recently posted..Farmers Market Recipe: Summer Corn Chowder

    • Ooohhhh i forgot to mention how stinky they are. We didn’t really have them where I came from (Chicago) so when I moved here they were one of those things I marveled at. Kudzo, camel crickets (AHHH), Bradford pears… all strange and foreign things to a Northerner like me.

      Also, I just can’t with Kevin Costner. My husband’s always all “he’s not that bad!” and I’m all “DID YOU SEE ROBIN HOOD? AND WATERWORLD? AND THE POSTMAN?” I rest my case.

  7. “Holier Than Thou” individuals… grrrrr…. Judas-like individuals — mean-spirited cloaked with a smile (I work one such person)….grrrrr…. loud people (seriously, why are you speaking so loudly and we’re not at a nightclub?)….grrrr…and while we’re on the subject: people speaking loudly on their mobile phones in public or quiet spaces (what are you, deaf, or speaking through tin cans with string?) – rude, rude, rude …. grrrrr… Everything that has to do with Kim Kardashian and her entire family — EVERYTHING….grrrr…. customer service reps with attitude whether on the phone or in person (hey, if you’re in the business of dealing with customers, hello, that’s your job — suck it up or leave!)….grrrrr….and while we’re on the subject: stupid and shallow People…Just people without a clue that take up time, energy and space and the people who fawn over them (examples of these people: Celebs who have nothing to say but have great PR reps and media hounds who are constantly shoving them in our faces)…and last but not least (yeah, you stirred something in me…): Folks who live up to the stereotype aligned with their communities and those who glorify them (the most recent example: Oxygen and their soon-to-be-released reality show on the rapper (more like, wrapper) with all his “baby mamas”…smh so hard it hurts my heart and makes my stomach sick. sigh.
    Brainy Pint Sizer recently posted..Looking Back: 2012…What a disappointment.

  8. Yes the bumper stickers are an issue, I live in Iowa and these “redneck” gun fuckers have bumper stickers with snarky comments about their rights, such as “don’t tread on my gun rights.” I just want to smash into their shitty old Chevrolet pickups. Buncha assholes

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