Breakdown, go ahead and give it to me

I just had a slight meltdown in the bathroom here at work.

My coworker calls me, and announces that I have to close the library today, because he’s taking off the rest of the day so he can burn up his vacation time before the end of the month. Now, this isn’t a HUGE deal but it does mean that not only do I have to stay an hour later than I’m supposed to, but thanks to the craptastic parking here on campus, I have to walk down to the library, and then walk back to my car, as there will NOT be any parking spaces in the lot by the library.

So not ONLY am I going to have to stay an hour later, but I am most likely going to be even later than THAT, because it takes me about 10 minutes to walk from the library to where my car will be parked.

Awesome. Now, this wouldn’t bother me so much if someone had ASKED ME. Not TOLD me, ASKED ME. I asked my coworker while on the phone with him, “What if I hadn’t been able to close?” and he had no answer for me, of course. That’s not an option. The guy who normally closes the library will not stay an hour later and close, nor should he. He had to work through his lunch yesterday, and close. That’s not very fair to him.

What pisses me off, is that they did not ASK ME. They TOLD ME. I’m the frigging SITE SUPERVISOR, CONSULT WITH ME BEFORE YOU MAKE PLANS ON MY BEHALF. What if I’d had somewhere to be?! What if my husband could not get a ride home from work?! WHAT IF I HAD PLANS?! Apparently this DOESN’T EXIST IN MY WORLD.

Ugh. So I was getting so upset over this, I ran to the bathroom and put myself in a stall and started crying. Then I got to thinking about how I was over-reacting, and that it was the result of hormones. Then I realized that I was feeling a little crampy, and that meant AF was definitely coming, and I started SOBBING. I got so upset, because I’m STILL not pregnant, top that off with this stupid situation with work and I really just kind of lost it. I’m still seething, and on the verge of tears.

Let me make this clear: This staying until 6 thing is NOT that big of a deal. It really isn’t. On a normal day, I probably would be upset, and pissed, but not like this. It’s these stupid, stupid hormones, and the fact that I know what it means makes things even worse. That’s the really, really upsetting thing.

Woo boy. This day is just MADE OF AWESOME.

/end sarcasm

/end rant

10 pounds gone, a mile jogged, allergy fits

Well as of this weekend, I have officially lost 10 pounds. I weighed in at 160 pounds on Saturday. I’m extremely excited, and proud that I’ve made it this far, but I do also realize that I have at LEAST 20 more to go.

On Sunday I wanted a break from the elliptical, so I decided to see how far I could jog on the treadmill at 5.0 MPH. I’ve never been able to jog a mile, so that was my goal. I didn’t think I’d make it but lo and behold, I did. And I wasn’t even really winded! I was extremely proud, and happy.

Sunday my diet went to hell, but I had expected it. My mother in law cooked an Easter dinner, and I ate the hell out of it. It was so fabulous and good, though I felt MISERABLE afterward. My stomach was like “What the HELL are you doing to me?!”

I have been getting really good exercise in the past week. I MAYBE have a new job on the horizon (this is a HUGE HUGE HUGE maybe, I haven’t even been called about an interview yet). My allergies are going crazy today even though I took a Claritin this morning. I hope they clear up soon, because I probably look really horrible with my runny nose and watery eyes.

I just found out that one of the group members from my Spark People local group lost her 9 year old daughter last week. She had an unexpected brain hemmorage, and died. I felt like someone slapped me in the face when I read that. I didn’t know her personally, but was supposed to meet her this coming Sunday for the walk. I don’t know if she’s going to attend or not, but I doubt it. I feel so sad, and so horrible for her.

I just sneezed three times in a row. I can’t (four times in a row) go home from work; for one, I went home last Monday and for two, my manager called out sick. So, I’m stuck here sneezing and sniffling.

That’s all for now..

Taking it easy

Ever since the kickboxing class on Wednesday, I’ve been taking it easy. My leg muscles are screaming at me, and upon the wise advise of my dear husband, I’ve decided to take today off. I worked out very lightly with Michelle last night (we just walked on treadmills.. I put an incline on mine, but walked at a steady/slow pace). Tomorrow it’s back, I have yoga in the morning. Woot!

There is a possibility of a new job on the horizon, one with a company I’ve kind of had my eye on in my peripheral vision for a few months. My friend Ryan works there, and the way he talks about it, it seems mega laid back, and just an overall good place to work. I’m excited about the prospect of a new job, because this one is wearing on me already. I haven’t even been here for a year, and already I’m tired of it. My coworkers and manager are very cool, but as far as professionally goes.. I’m left with a lot of work picking up where others lack. And I’m not okay with that. I also don’t feel like I get paid enough for the work I do.

So, we’ll see what happens. I went to my coworker’s going away mini-party today. He got a new job.. I had a slice of cake and a handful of Doritos. I went to McDonald’s for lunch and got a Happy Meal with apple slices instead of french fries. I looked up the nutritional info, and the cheeseburger I had was only 300 calories, much to my surprise. So I don’t feel too horrible about the things I’ve eaten today.

I can’t wait to get this weight off, and feel like me again. It’s going to be wonderful.

Good morning

I had a very good weekend… I got some good exercise in, ate a few too many bad foods (I wasn’t horrible but I also was not as good as I should have been), and didn’t really feel badly about it. I played Warhammer Saturday night with my husband, brother in law, and our friends, and my character died within an hour and a half of gameplay. I didn’t mind; I really did not care for her.

We played again Sunday, with me rolling up a new character whom I like way better than my last.

That’s enough gaming talk.

I weighed in Saturday at 162.5, which puts me at a 7 1/2 pound weight loss in 5 weeks. Not bad. I’m getting impatient because while my clothes are fitting better, I’m still not at the point where I need new pants. Most of the change I can see is in my upper body; my arms and whatnot. My thighs are still gigantic. I didn’t get a chance to measure myself, so hopefully this coming weekend I’ll get to and I’ll see a change.

Today is my rest day, which is good. I’m feeling kind of sore. Ugh. I am putting off doing these stupid monthly summaries for work. If you saw them and the work involved, you’d be putting them off, too. I’m not sure how much longer I can stay in this job, doing the things I do, for this pay. Even if they paid me more, I don’t think I’d want to stay here much longer.

Ugh.