Internet Forever

I was talking to a group of blogging friends of mine last night and posed a question: how long have you been on the internet?

There has been a computer in my home since I was very young. I actually do not have memory of a home sans computer. I have been on the internet since I was a child – maybe around 9 years old or so. My first internet service provider was Prodigy, and back then my favorite thing to do was post on the only thing I had access to – message boards. My favorite message board to frequent was a Baby-Sitter’s Club message board. Looking back on my first experiences with being online, I’m amazed at how unsupervised I was. But my parents’ generation didn’t know any better. It was really a time before people were aware that internet predators existed.

After Prodigy came AOL. Ahh, AOL. I can remember when you paid by the hour, and I can still hear the noise my dial-up modem made. Once I discovered AOL and the glory that was chatrooms, I was hooked for good. I used to spend hours (yes, hours) in chatrooms. Specifically, I would spend hours in role-playing chatrooms.

DISCLAIMER: I’m about to go like, hardcore nerd here. You have my permission to laugh. I don’t care.

My first boyfriend and his buddies tuned me in to these role-playing chatrooms. There was a whole network of people who created online characters who “lived” in a fictional realm called RhyDin (are you laughing yet?). My character was a vampire named Rina. Rina was a badass who liked to wear red and black fishnets (I was also really into the Rocky Horror Picture Show). Rina would frequent this one popular chatroom known as the Red Dragon Inn, the social hub for all of these fantasy characters to go and interact. Sometimes fights would break out, and that’s when you’d break out your digital dice and “roll” them to see who emerged triumphant. This was probably the most inconvenient time to get kicked offline, because damnit, I NEED TO KICK THE ASS OF THIS WARRIOR WHO MAY OR MAY NOT ACTUALLY BE A 400 POUND SWEATY GUY WITH A MULLET WEARING A ‘FRANKIE SAYS RELAX’ T-SHIRT.

In case all of that isn’t nerdy enough for you, I also joined a guild called the Silent Warriors of RhyDin Eternal (SWoRE. I could not make this shit up if I tried, folks). We had pretend online fighting tournaments and shit. It was through these chatrooms that I met my ex-boyfriend; the one that I would eventually move away from Chicago to Tennessee with.

Once AOL had more or less gone the way of the dodo, I moved on to other social forums like LiveJournal. I began my LiveJournal in 2001 at the age of 17. I still have it, though I haven’t been active in posting there since I started this blog four years ago. I have always been an internet geek and now that we are living in the time of social media, I’m pretty much in geek heaven. I love social media. I love having information readily available at my fingertips. I love making friendships with fellow moms and bloggers across the country that I never would have met otherwise. I still remember some of the people I met in my AOL days and wonder what they’re doing now. There is something about the internet and technology that have always had a hold on me, and I don’t see that changing anytime soon.

How long have you been online? What are some of your earliest memories of the internet? Do you think I’m a complete dweeb for my online role-playing?


When Internetz Meets Real Life.

I’ve come to realize that there are a few different ways people view the internet nowadays. For some, it’s scary and almost a thing of myth. For others it’s confusing and frustrating. There are folks who know it exist, use it to check their “Facepages” and “Tweeters” but only about once a week. And then there are people like me, who pretty much breathe Internet.

Sometimes, my Internet world and the world of those oblivious to all of the wonders the web holds collide. Tonight was one of those nights.

We were walking downtown and veered into an ice cream shop. As we were waiting in line, I noticed a skinny teenage girl looking at me with her head tilted slightly. I blinked at her and she laughed.
“I was trying to read your t-shirt.”
“Oh,” I said with a chuckle.
Awkward silence.
“….What does it say?” she prompted.
Way to go, slick. Social skills. I has them.

Now, the t-shirt in question is a gray shirt with the words “HONEY BADGER DON’T CARE” on it, and a picture of a fierce-ass honey badger. I love it and wear it at least once a week, because I’m fucking awesome.

“Oh…” I began. “It says, ‘honey badger don’t care.'”
She stared at me.
“What does that mean?”
I laughed.
“Oh! It’s this really funny video… Thing… On.. the…….. Internet….. It’s.. Um.. Funny.. On YouTube.”
She was like: *blank stare*
“Oh…” she trailed off, looking confused.


I realized then that unlike myself, some people do not enjoy spending their free time on blogs, Facebook, and YouTube looking up Auto-Tuned newscasts or hilariously narrated videos about vicious wild animals. Some people go outside, play frisbee, hike, and do other things that don’t involve honey badgers and parody commercials. I felt really awkward and dorky for a second, and then I started thinking about how funny honey badger was and decided I didn’t care what the teenage ice cream girl thought of me.

Honey badger and I have two things in common. We’re both mean and like to eat bees, and we both don’t give a shit. Okay so that was three things. Shut up. Here, go watch this brilliant auto-tune video of a crazy lady talking about a robbery.

P.S. If you’ve never seen honey badger, check it out here. It’s not safe for work, or little ears. But it is funny as shit.


Texts From My Husband: We’re Not Normal People.

I’ve decided to start a regular post series for your enjoyment called “Texts From My Husband”. It’s just a little glimpse into our weird little family. We had this conversation while sitting directly beside each other on the couch the other night:

Josh: You + Me = 10,000 babies!
Me: Will they run as fast as Kenyans? {reference this video to get the joke if you don’t already}
Josh: Faster and three will fly.
Me: Yesssss flying babies 4 eva.
Josh: And fire breathing
Me: I hope they also have dragon tails.
Josh: One will.. I think one will have gills and kill every shark in the world.
Me: What will his name be?
Josh: Strom the Shark Slayer
Me: Can we call him S3 for short?
Josh: One will be able to telepathically control all rodents.
Me: So we have a fire breather with a dragon tail, a shark slayer and a master of rodents.
Josh: And one that is a really good cook. And of course, Rose who is beautiful, brilliant, funny, and an amazing singer and also awesome at everything………….. Just like her mama>
Me: Awwwwwww.

The moral of this story is that we’re not normal people. And my husband is sweet. The end.

If this post made you laugh, smirk, smile, or stare blankly at the screen.. Please vote for me at Circle of Moms Top 25 Baby Journals. Thank you!


It Clicks the Button & Casts a Vote. It Does This Whenever It’s Told.

Apparently someone out there in cyberspace thinks I’m not a total spaz, because my blog has been nominated for Circle of Moms Top 25 Baby Journals. I don’t know who it was, but it makes me feel warm and fuzzy and gooey inside. Warm, fuzzy, and gooey is kind of a weird combination but that’s how I feel. I also feel just a little squishy, and somewhat hungry. Seriously, I don’t have clue who did it but whoever you are, THANK YOU.

So here’s the part where I ask you to vote for me and all that jazz. There are a lot of really creative, funny, popular bloggers nominated so I probably don’t even have a snowball’s chance in hell. But what the hell, I’m feisty so if you wouldn’t mind, please click on the button below and vote for Mommy Boots? You can vote once a day, so if you feel inclined to stalk the page each and every morning I’m not going to stop you.


<—— That’s the button you click. It’ll take you to a page with a list of blogs. Click the “thumbs up” next to Mommy Boots, and you’re done. It does this once a day, or else it goes the hose again.


Dialect Vlog 2: Electric Boogaloo

It’s time for another fun and wacky (maybe not so wacky, but I am still a spazzy dork so have fun with that) vlog from Mommy Boots! Watch me struggle to say “entrepreneurial” and blink too much! Also, I slapped on concealer, foundation, and blush just for this damn vlog so watch the whole thing or I’ll find you and smack you in the face with a pancake.

Pillow, Exhausted, Governor, Entrepreneurial, Calm, Milwaukee Wisconsin, Bagel, ambulance, aqua, femoral, address, rural, hypocrisy
What do you call a store where you buy alcohol?
What do you call it when you blow on a baby’s tummy and make them laugh?
What do you call batting your eyelashes on someone’s cheek?
What is another way of saying, “to deceive,” or “swindle?”
What is a funny way to say someone is not smart? (one fry short of a happy meal?)
Another name for butt?
What do you call it when you drive through mud. Lots of it, often fast and pray you don’t get stuck?

There’s my superfunfantasticsexycrazypurpletiger Dialect Vlog. Click the button below and check out a few other vlogs. If you feel saucy and wanna do your own, be sure to stop by Mama Dweeb and link up! Bye!

Weekend of Harmony

I’m back from my Sweet Adeline weekend. I always forget how amazing and exhausting regional competition weekend is. I’m really proud of my chorus; we came in 3rd place overall and 2nd in our division (mid-sized chorus). We improved in score since last year, and I am just very proud to call myself a member of the Scenic City Chorus!

The quartet competition was fantastic. Loads of great quartets got up there on Friday and my chorus’s director’s quartet won! Her quartet is called Dream and they were absolutely amazing. I mean breathtaking. I kept telling my director all weekend that I wanted to be like them when I “grew up”. Since they won the quartet competition for our region, they get to go on to the International competition in October where they will compete against the top quartets from all over the world! I’m so excited for them!

It’s hard sometimes coming back from a Sweet Adeline weekend. It’s a truly amazing experience; sharing a space with hundreds of women who all share your love and passion for singing barbershop harmony. There’s flair, bling, and glitter in pretty much every nook and cranny that you can find. It’s not unusual to find people who don’t even know each other singing barbershop tags in the elevator, lobby, and even bathroom. I am positive that the cleaning staff dread our regional competition weekends because there is  glitter all over the floors EVERYWHERE.

I’m unwinding and relaxing now, and trying to gear myself up for getting back to reality tomorrow! I hope you all had a great weekend because I know that I did.


Stop: Glitter Time {2011 Competition}

If you’re new to Mommy Boots, you may not have read any posts about one of my passions: singing. Specifically singing a capella barbershop harmony. I sing with a local chapter of the Sweet Adelines International and I’m also a member of a barbershop quartet called Route 41.

Tonight kicks off the beginning of Region 23 (the region that my chorus is in)’s competition weekend! The Young Women in Harmony quartet competition starts tonight. My quartet was asked to be microphone testers, which we are so excited about! Tomorrow night is the quartet competition and I cannot wait to sit and watch the competing quartets. We’ve been running around town the last week promoting the contest with TV appearances (if you’re feeling ambitious and want to see us on TV, check out this clip. You will have to let it load, and then fast-forward to the 48:00 mark to get to the point where my quartet sings) and radio spots. Last year, Route 41 sang for evaluation only. We decided not to sing for eval or compete this year, so I will get to relax and enjoy where last year I was a bundle of nerves!

Saturday is the big day. On Saturday, my chorus takes the stage to compete against all of the other choruses in the region (which I believe is about 14)! We’ve taken third place overall the past three years and we are pumped and excited to sing our hearts out this year. We’ve been working really hard and I just cannot wait to show everyone what we are made of.

I will not be around online at all this weekend. I’ll be surrounded by Sweet Adelines, soaking in the harmony and excitement of the weekend and generally geeking out. I hope everyone has a fun and safe weekend! I know I’m going to!!!



Mommy Boots Speaks {Dialect Vlog}

Someone passed on a link to Ashley Getting Dressed, who did a fun and cute dialect vlog. The point is to say a list of words, and answer a list of questions to see how different bloggers sound in different parts of the country. A few bloggers that I know and love have participated:
Pickles & Paisleys
Little BGCG
Haute Single Mama
She’s Mommafied
Million Dream Mom
Daddy Green’s Pride (my husband!)
Baby Dickey
Baby Gator’s Den
3 Kids and Us
Soleil Selene
Mama Dweeb
Mama & the Dudes

Here is my vlog. Enjoy!

Untitled from Natalie Green on Vimeo.

Here is the list of words, and also the list of questions :

Aunt, Route, Wash, Oil, Theater, Iron, Salmon, Caramel, Fire, Water, Sure, Data, Ruin, Crayon, Toilet, New Orleans, Pecan, Both, Again, Probably, Spitting image, Alabama, Lawyer, Coupon, Mayonnaise, Syrup, Pajamas, Caught
What is it called when you throw toilet paper on a house?
What is the bug that when you touch it, it curls into a ball?
What is the bubbly carbonated drink called?
What do you call gym shoes?
What do you say to address a group of people?
What do you call the kind of spider that has an oval-shaped
body and extremely long legs?
What do you call your grandparents?
What do you call the wheeled contraption in which you carry
groceries at the supermarket?
What do you call it when rain falls while the sun is shining?
What is the thing you change the TV channel with?

I’ve learned a few things by watching my own vlog.

  • My hair looked funny when I recorded this.
  • My sinuses make my eyes dry. I blink a lot.
  • The angle I chose? Not so flattering.
  • I’m dorktastic!

I should have done something with my hair and slapped on some damn concealer. Hope you enjoyed me in my spaztastic, tired-looking glory. If you create a dialect vlog, be sure to link up in the comments!